Gateway Vincentian Volunteers: Our Lives

A phone crooked at the shoulder, putting on a student’s Band-Aid with one hand, buzzing open the front door with the other, and trying to run off copies of the weekly newsletter all at the same time has become a commonplace situation this year. I came to St. Louis Catholic Academy to be the “Parent Liaison,” unsure of what that meant, but excited to be working with families—and the experience has changed my heart forever.

St. Louis Catholic Academy is an understaffed, overworked Catholic school with a heart of gold. Located in urban North Saint Louis, with over 85% of the student body qualifying for free and reduced government lunch, it is a school on a mission: to provide a quality, affordable private education, especially for the underserved in its community. The beauty of St. Louis Catholic Academy is that, upon entering, one would never guess that this school is any different than any other private school one might encounter. The staff works tirelessly to find grants, aid programs, and ways to get new technology and state-of-the-art curriculum into the classrooms. The volunteer staff is irreplaceable, as they have been establishing a library (of mostly donations), working as classroom aides, and providing tutoring for students enrolled in our after-care program.

The second glance at SLCA is really where the rubber meets the road. Being a Parent Liaison to families in such situations that they require so much aid has brought me joy, broken my heart, and given me new eyes to see the world. I spent a month helping in the office. One day of answering the phones and the front door—hearing the stories of why so-and-so is late, trying to track down parents of sick children whose numbers have changed three times, sifting through custody battles, lost jobs, grandparent caregiver illnesses, an angry parent trying to find someone or something to blame—all of this can awaken any range of emotions.

Looking at the students in their matching uniforms, I find it easy to forget the roads many of them must take, every day.

So what is a Parent Liaison? I’ve spent the past year answering that question, simply by jumping in with both feet. We have 177 students, and 177 stories. A year has not been enough time to learn all of them, but they have all touched me. I have had the privilege of getting to know the students—their likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses—and sharing them with their teachers and caregivers. I have had the privilege of encouraging the beginnings of an independent parent organization, full of bright ideas and wisdom far beyond my own, to bring families together and get parents involved with their children. I have had the privilege of being a driving force behind several initiatives to increase school communication with the families, from phone calls to emails to a weekly newsletter.

Most importantly though, I’ve had the privilege of calling many of the people I’ve worked with “my friend.” They have taught me far more about life and about myself than I could have imagined. This position has become intimately intertwined with my whole experience as a Gateway Vincentian Volunteer. St. Vincent always strove to help the most vulnerable and marginalized in society. My worksite embodies the spirit of Vincent in ways I will continue to unpack for the rest of my life. He may not be mentioned or talked about, but there is a mural of him on the wall near the front entrance, and his charism is lived out here, everyday. For better or worse, I’ve got the “Vincentian Spirit” in my blood, and this year I’ve experienced a blurring of the lines between work, service, and friendship.

You will find out that Charity is a heavy burden to carry, heavier than the kettle of soup and basket of bread. But you must keep your gentleness and your smile. Giving soup and bread isn’t all that the rich can do. The poor are your masters, terribly sensitive and exacting, as you will see. But the uglier and the dirtier they are, the more unjust and bitter—the more you must give them your love. It is only because of your love—only your love, that the poor will forgive you the bread that you give them.

The names listed below are those who have made contributions to the Gateway Vincentian Volunteers program since our last newsletter in April. We are so grateful to each of you for your generosity. It is because of you that we are able to continue the mission of spreading the charism of St. Vincent DePaul to young adults. The volunteers serve hundreds of people in poverty each year and are a huge help to the agencies and organization with whom they work. Thank you for making that possible!

An anonymous Vincentian
Delbert & Agnes Bohnert
Pong & Anna Chan (Parents of GVV 09-10 Elizabeth Chan)
William & Mary de Haas
Paul Heidemann
Brian Kelly (GVV 03-04)
John & Donna Prost
Rev. John Richardson, C.M.
Gerald & Joan Wentzel
Grace Whalen
Thomas & Frances Wilcox

The ordination of Jeremy Dixon, C.M. (GVV 03-04)
from Christy Leming (GVV 03-04)

We also sincerely thank our donors who have asked to remain anonymous. If we have inadvertently omitted your name from our donor list, please accept our sincere apology AND let us know so that we can correct the error!

Elizabeth Gappa DeBoo was one of eleven teachers in the Archdiocese of St. Louis that was honored with the 2010 Archbishop Raymond L. Burke Teacher of the Year Award. Elizabeth teaches at St. Frances Cabrini Academy in South St. Louis (and has since her GVV year of service ended in 2002), and was the chosen Teacher of the Year from all teachers in Region One of the Archdiocese.

Many thanks to ALL who made our golf tournament a great success. We are especially grateful to Denny Cuddihee, our golf committee chairperson, and the committee: Barry Cahill, Fr. Jim Cormack, C.M., Steve Hamby, Mike Kapilla, Rich La Plume, Fr. David Nations, C.M., Fr. Ed Murphy, C.M., and Sr. Kathy Overmann, D.C. A huge thanks also to our cooks Harry Wilson and George Dennis, our star helper Renee Trahant, and all the 2009-2010 GVVs who worked so hard the day of the tournament. And last but not least, we thank our wonderful and faithful golfers! Listed below are the names of our donors and sponsors who helped make the tournament such a success.

Corporate Benefactors: Nestlé Purina Pet Care Company and Kelley Real Estate
Ascension Health
Anonymous Donor
Larry and Amelia Berra
Cafazza Pest Control—Jerry Cafazza
John and Mary Capellupo
The Corner Pub and Grill
Dennis and Susan Cuddihee
Elizabeth DeBoo
Katie DeClue
Tom and Patti Dinkins
Drury Hotels
Eagle Springs Golf Course—Martha Doss
The Franciscan Connection—Br. Donald Lachowicz, OFM
Gateway Sealing—Dave Black
Grey Eagle Distributors—David Stokes
Guardian Angel Settlement Association
G & W Meat and Bavarian Style Sausage Co., Inc.
Hodak’s Restaurant
Bill Hopfinger—Rehab1 Network
David Jacobsmeyer—Jacobsmeyer-Stillman, Private Investment Advisory Group, Wells Fargo Advisors, LLC
Martha Lane
Jim and Sally Laurentius
Ken and Marian Lemp
Normandy Golf Club
Mike and Katy Kapilla
JJ Twig’s Restaurant
St. John’s Mercy Neighborhood Ministry
Pepsi Americas—Chuck Amburg
The People of St. Catherine Labouré Parish
St. Louis Cardinal Kyle McClellan
Dr. John W. Tabash Child and Adult Orthodontics
The Schicker Family
The Society of St. Vincent DePaul of St. Clare of Assisi Parish
The Society of St. Vincent DePaul of St. Margaret of Scotland Parish
Tricia Schicker Thiel and John Thiel
State Farm Insurance—Scott Petersen
The Vincentians of Lazarist Residence
Joe and Kathy Vitale
Robert Vondera
Walters Golf
John Wosman—Diesel Fuel Injection Service, Inc.
Zielinksi & Associates, P.C.

When I was given my worksite options as a future GVV, I insisted on working at the Franciscan Connection’s
Stone-by-Stone Project. Even though another GVV was already placed there and I had very little experience in home repair, I was quite adamant. During former volunteer experiences, I felt like my efforts were a temporary solution. I reasoned that home repair—a concrete, tangible service—would alleviate any questions about “giving a man a fish for the day,” as the saying goes.

Much to my surprise, I faced more questions and challenges than anticipated. The effectiveness of volunteering, the blurred line of enabling or empowering, and witnessing how people in poverty were being taken advantage of were some of the many macro-perspective questions and challenges that developed during my daily work. Combined with the anger at a few outrageous requests by clients and witnessing the inequity of the services we provide, I was ready to “zip it up and zip it out!”

But I had told myself at the beginning of the program that if I helped one person this year, then everything would be worth it. I found this person in Eugene. Even though he didn’t fit in the demographics of our financial grants, Brother Donald graciously let us visit his house and eventually help provide him with his basic needs.

Steven and I were there when he first showed us his house, which was being renovated when burglars broke in and stole all his copper pipes. We were there when a plumber soldered a tricky pipe that allowed him to have a shower, toilet, and sink for the first time in two years. We were there when a local business fixed his furnace so that he wouldn’t have to heat a bucket of water over an electric heater. We were there when our electric team gave him new lights, our carpenter gave him a new back door, and a spring break group gave him a kitchen and bathroom that previously hadn’t existed.

During our time at his home, I got to know Eugene as a person. I ate lunch with him, looked through his pictures, listened to his music, and heard his stories. As our time with him came to a close, he took me to his backyard where he had a small garden. It had had great fertilizer for the past two years, he joked, and produced corn stalks taller than him! “Before you came, it was like I was living in a different country,” he said, “you all really brought me back to America.” Even though he thought we saved him, he really saved me. At that moment, any possible doubts, concerns, and feelings of hopelessness or giving up disappeared and made everything worthwhile.

Both Elizabeth Chan and Steven Falk, GVVs 09-10, worked at The Franciscan Connection this year.

In a rarely used and overly elegant ballroom, I follow up on a lead that I got from a friend earlier in the day regarding free food. I'm not sure what this event is for, but I do know that I can eat anonymously and meet up with some friends before we go to church a few blocks away. I am the first one of my friends here, so I make a plate, pick up a drink, and sit just far enough away from people that I'm not obviously isolated, but far enough away that I'm not likely to be spoken to.

As another guy around my age finishes picking things from the mini-buffet line, he sits next to me and makes some friendly comment that acknowledges that he is sitting next to another human. We start talking pleasantly about how strangely the room is decorated and wondering whether the quartet in the room is warming up or playing some kind of post-jazz piece. We're basically talking nonsense—not exchanging any personal information and having a conversation based on some original off-the-wall comment—and I'm enjoying myself. At this point in time I realize that this guy is not wearing shoes. I like this guy—he must be some fellow student who has shed all social conventions and doesn't care who he pleases or offends; he is just himself.

My friends arrive and we eat there for a while and talk some
with the guy I’ve just met; I find out that his name is Josue. As we're leaving to go to a church meeting, I ask him if he wants to join us and he agrees. After the meeting, as I am setting us up to part ways, he mentions that he doesn't have a place to go. Some things click in my mind as this information comes out—he isn't wearing shoes, he is dressed rather shabbily, and he was a little too good at coming up with his part of the nonsense conversations that we had. This is a homeless person that perhaps is not all there, cognitively.

I do like Josue though, and after attending the church service, I feel ashamed to not provide shelter to the poor wanderer as Isaiah compels me to do. To make a short story shorter still, I invited him to stay the night at the house where I lived with my roommates, and it became apparent that he had memory problems such that in the morning he asked if we had met each other the day before. He did not want to leave, and I was ready for him to leave for reasons that I will not go into, but some of which may be easily assumed.

Feeling confident in his memory disorder, I told him I had to go to class, dropped him off downtown in an area where I thought a Salvation Army might be in the general vicinity, and told him when and where to meet me in the afternoon. I was at the location that I told him at the time that I told him, but I was rightly confident that his memory troubles would keep him from meeting me there.

As it turns out, following Jesus is more complicated than I thought, and it requires more than I am willing to give. Two years have passed since this encounter and I still haven't found a great way to change how much I am willing to give. I have, however, made some strides in increasing how much I am able to give.

This year, as a Gateway Vincentian Volunteer, I have worked as something like a case manager at Community Alternatives, providing support to people with mental illness in widely varying areas of their lives. I have become acquainted with many community resources where people can get services and support beyond what I alone can give. I have a long way yet that I still hope to go, but, if I meet another Josue, then I will be able to give more. Let us pray that in that hour we will be willing to.

ZAFÈN, Creole for “it’s our business,” offers you the opportunity to lend or
contribute to sustainable economic development in Haiti.

On Saturday, May 29, 2010, Jeremy Dixon, C.M. (GVV 03-04), was ordained a priest at the hands of Most Reverend Francis J. Kane, Auxiliary Bishop of Chicago. The ordination took place at St. Vincent DePaul Parish in Chicago.

A reception was held at DePaul University following the ordination. Jeremy was joined by his family, many friends, Vincentians, and Daughters of Charity. Jeremy celebrated his first mass on Sunday, May 30, at St. Vincent DePaul Church.

Fr. Ed Murphy, C.M., President
Mr. Rich LaPlume, Vice-President
Ms. Tricia Thiel, Treasurer
Mr. John Capellupo
Fr. Jim Cormack, C.M.
Janel Esker
Martha Lane
Joseph Komadina
Sr. Rosa Lee Kramer, D.C.
Fr. David Nations, C.M.
Sr. Kathy Overman, D.C.
Jim and Geri Ryan, Directors

Gateway Vincentian Volunteers
2912 Arsenal Street
St. Louis, MO 63118
(314) - 771-1474
Toll free: (888)-771-7220
Fax: (314) - 771-2410
email: gatevol@aol.com